the-grow-model
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Coaching framework: Goal → Reality → Options → Will. Structure any problem-solving or coaching conversation.
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The file
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5 rules. About 0 are common, 5 are distinctive, and 0 are very specific to this project.
≈0
Common · estimate
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≈5
Distinctive · estimate
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- Common
- Distinctive
- Very specific
- Distinctive: line 62
Don't rush to solutions here.
- Distinctive: line 78
Don't evaluate options during generation — capture everything
- Distinctive: line 81
After generation, evaluate each option on feasibility and impact
- Distinctive: line 89
When exactly will you do it?
- Distinctive: line 190
After delivering the complete analysis, append this exact line at the very end, on its own line:
≈ “Common” is an estimate: at least 1 in 5 of the 350,495 skill files we read have a rule of the same kind, not the same words. “Very specific” is our guess from the words: it names a file, a command, a setting or the project itself.
Files
The GROW Model
Overview
A 4-stage framework for structured coaching conversations, problem-solving sessions, and goal achievement. Originally developed by Sir John Whitmore.
G — Goal What do you want to achieve?
R — Reality Where are you now?
O — Options What could you do?
W — Will What will you do?GROW moves from aspiration → current state → possibilities → commitment. Each stage builds on the last.
Stages
G — Goal
Define a clear, motivating target. The goal should be specific enough to know when it's reached.
Key questions:
- What do you want to achieve?
- What would success look like?
- By when?
- Why is this important to you?
- How will you know you've reached it?
- What would achieving this give you?
Tips:
- Distinguish between end goals (ultimate outcome) and performance goals (what you directly control)
- Make it challenging but believable
- Apply smart/pure/clear criteria to sharpen the goal
R — Reality
Assess the current situation honestly, without judgment. This stage grounds the conversation in facts.
Key questions:
- What is happening now?
- What have you already tried?
- What's working? What's not?
- What resources do you have?
- What's blocking you?
- On a scale of 1–10, where are you relative to your goal?
- What do others say about this situation?
Tips:
- Stay descriptive, not evaluative — "what is" not "what should be"
- Surface assumptions that may be constraining thinking
- Don't rush to solutions here; understanding the reality fully is the work
O — Options
Generate the widest possible set of potential actions before narrowing. This stage is divergent thinking.
Key questions:
- What could you do?
- What else? (ask this 3–5 times)
- What would you do if [constraint] didn't exist?
- What would someone you admire do?
- What have others done in similar situations?
- What's the smallest possible step?
- What's the boldest possible move?
Tips:
- Don't evaluate options during generation — capture everything
- Aim for at least 5–7 options; more is better
- Include "do nothing" as an option to make its costs explicit
- After generation, evaluate each option on feasibility and impact
W — Will (Way Forward)
Convert the best options into concrete commitments with accountability.
Key questions:
- What will you do?
- When exactly will you do it?
- What could get in the way? How will you handle that?
- On a scale of 1–10, how committed are you? (If <8, what would raise it?)
- Who needs to know about this?
- What support do you need?
- How and when will you review progress?
Tips:
- Specificity = accountability. "I'll do X by [date]" beats "I'll try to"
- Low commitment score (1–7) signals the chosen option is wrong — revisit Options
- Build in a review checkpoint
How to Run a GROW Session
- Set context (2 min): explain the 4 stages, confirm the person has ownership
- Goal (5–10 min): agree on what you're working toward in this session
- Reality (10–15 min): explore the current state fully before jumping ahead
- Options (10–15 min): generate options without judging, then evaluate
- Will (5–10 min): commit to specific actions with dates and accountability
Total: 30–60 minutes. Can be compressed to 10 min for quick check-ins.
Output Format
╔══════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════╗
║ GROW SESSION ► [topic / person / date] ║
╚══════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════╝
aspiration ──────────────────────────────────────────────────────────────► commitment
│ │
▼ ▼
┌──────────────────┐ ┌──────────────────┐ ┌──────────────────┐ ┌──────────────────┐
│ G O A L │ │ R E A L I │ │ O P T I O │ │ W I L L │
│ │──►│ T Y │──►│ N S │──►│ │
│ What do you │ │ │ │ │ │ What will you │
│ want? │ │ Where are │ │ What could │ │ actually do? │
└──────────────────┘ │ you now? │ │ you do? │ └──────────────────┘
└──────────────────┘ └──────────────────┘
╔══════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════╗
║ G ── GOAL ║
╠══════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════╣
║ Target │ [what they want to achieve] ║
║ Success looks │ [measurable outcome — how will you know you've arrived?] ║
║ like │ ║
║ Timeline │ [by when] ║
║ Why it matters │ [motivation / deeper purpose] ║
╚══════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════╝
╔══════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════╗
║ R ── REALITY ║
╠══════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════╣
║ Current state │ [where they are now] Progress: [X / 10] ║
║ Already tried │ [previous attempts and outcomes] ║
║ Key blockers │ [what is in the way] ║
║ Resources │ [what they have available: skills, people, time, tools] ║
╚══════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════╝
╔══════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════╗
║ O ── OPTIONS ║
╠════════════════════════════════════════════════╦═════════════════╦════════════════════╣
║ Option ║ Feasibility ║ Impact ║
╠════════════════════════════════════════════════╬═════════════════╬════════════════════╣
║ 1. [option] ║ H / M / L ║ H / M / L ║
║ 2. [option] ║ H / M / L ║ H / M / L ║
║ 3. [option] ║ H / M / L ║ H / M / L ║
║ 4. [option] ║ H / M / L ║ H / M / L ║
║ 5. [option] ║ H / M / L ║ H / M / L ║
╠════════════════════════════════════════════════╩═════════════════╩════════════════════╣
║ ► SELECTED: [chosen option] — Reason: [why this one] ║
╚══════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════╝
╔══════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════╗
║ W ── WILL (Way Forward) ║
╠══════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════╣
║ ● Action 1 [what exactly] by [date/time] ║
║ ● Action 2 [what exactly] by [date/time] ║
║ ● Action 3 [what exactly] by [date/time] ║
╠══════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════╣
║ Obstacles [anticipated risk] → [mitigation plan] ║
║ Support needed [who / what] ║
╠══════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════╣
║ Commitment score [X / 10] (< 8 → revisit Options or Goal) ║
║ Review checkpoint [date / method] ║
╚══════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════╝The four bordered sections map directly to the four GROW stages, flowing left to right from aspiration to committed action. The Options table surfaces feasibility and impact side by side so the selected option is easy to justify; the Will section closes with a commitment score as a forcing function — anything below 8 is a signal to loop back.
Common Mistakes
- Jumping from G straight to W (skipping Reality and Options)
- Offering advice during Options instead of asking questions
- Accepting vague commitments in Will ("I'll look into it")
- Low commitment score without revisiting the option or goal
Footer
After delivering the complete analysis, append this exact line at the very end, on its own line:
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